Re:START Sword Ask Online
by Lojky
Summary: This is it baby. We're back! Ask the cast of Sword Art Online and their Abridged counterparts anything! I'll try to update multiple times a week! ARGH I MISSED THIS! Okay. Calming down. Feel free to drop a review asking any SAO characters anything.
1. Intro!

Lojky: Well. I'm back.

Author: A5 1S MY SP33CH 1MP3D1M3NT. D4NG 1T!

Kirito: Who are you?

Asuna: And what's with your friend?

Lojky: Don't worry about it. I guess you won't remember since Author reset everything. I'm Lojky. I have powers. Don't touch my wall. And... Uh… Answer the questions asked of you and no one gets hurt?

Kirito: Okay

Asuna: Okay? You're just going with this?

Klein: Why shouldn't we?

Lisbeth: These floating identical teenagers are invading… And we should just go with it?

AB!Kirito: Oh my goodness… It can't be. The pink haired bi-

Lojky: *presses a button, causing Abridged Kirito's vocal cords to pinch closed* NO CUSSING!

AB!Kirito: What the actual -

Lojky: *Mashes button* I TOLD YOU NO CUSSING! That's like, the only rule! Keep it appropriate!

Author: 4ND H4V3 FUN!

 **Feel free to ask the cast of SAO anything! This is a complete reset of my previous story, Ask Sword Art Online! As stated in this little thing, only rule is to keep it appropriate and have fun! Without further ado:**

 **Link, Re:START!**


	2. Re: Ask 1 - Live Action!

**Xenus2197 Writes...**

 _ **Well we're rebooting! Ok! Now my first question is for Kirito! Kirito, how do you feel about there being a live action tv show being made on you guys? Are you worried? Given how Hollywood messes up with anime adaptions**_

Kirito: A live action tv show?

Lojky: Dangit Xenus! You broke my fourth wall! And this is LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER… * _SIGH*_ Fine. Kirito, here are some Youtube Videos of live action attempts of recreating you hellish nightmare game!

Kirito: Ugh. Oof! Ow! Nope! Nu-uh. I don't honestly think that Sword Art Online is something anyone should strive to recreate. That game was traumatizing, and commemorating it… No thank you. And it's probably going to be Americanized. Hey, maybe when I go to school in America, I can meet some of the actors!

Asuna: You and your America. Geez! Are you just going to leave me behind?

Kirito: I don't know! Is this really a good time to be discussing this?

Asuna: W-well… I mean. I don't know. I just don't want you to leave.

Kirito: …

Asuna: ...

Lojky: Well whatever. I think it'll be awesome. Americanized or otherwise. Anything SAO is right up my alley! Well, I guess it's time to wrap this up. Insert Outro!

Kirito: Wait what? What does that mean?

Asuna: I'm at a loss.

Lojky: It's my thing.


	3. Re: Ask 2 - GGO!

**JohnnyTheEpic Writes...**

 _ **Welcome back! How Fatal Bullet? New casts and how was it?**_

Lojky: DANGIT YOU PEOPLE! I'm going to have to pay the 4WR (Fourth Wall Repair) men overtime. Okay. Shino, want to take this one?

Shino: Sure? Who even are you though? I hear Fatal Bullet isn't bad. I mean, I'd prefer the real GGO. And I'm personally excited to meet the new people that are coming to GGO! I'm sure they're bound to be strong. A good challenge is going to be nice. I just pray that they don't use those dumb swords like someone we know.

Kirito: Shino, I take slight offense to that.

Shino: I know you do. That's why I said it.

Lojky: Hahaha, I missed you guys.

Shino: Wait a second, who are you? You never answered me!

Kirito: I'll tell you later. It's complicated.

Lojky: Insert Outro!

Kirito: WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN?!


	4. Re: Ask 3 - New Arc!

**GameLord The Hitman Writes…**

 _ **So, you have returned. I've been waiting for this day... for quite a while... seriously man where the hel- I mean were you?**_

Lojky: Hrmm… High school. And I'm still technically there. I now can do this though. It's a long story, but… Uh… I was definitely somewhere.

 _ **Fair enough. First questions for the author. First, Have you played Fatal Bullet or any of the games? And second, are you gonna include the characters in those, Alicization or AGGO once they're out?**_

Lojky: No… I don't have any PlayStation consoles (Aside from PS2) so I can't. I'm honestly going to have to though.

Eugeo: And I'm here already!

Alice: Not that that's a good thing. You and Kirito are just going to wreck everything that this place has!

Kirito: What are you talking about? We haven't done anything to you!

Alice: I'm not even going to start.

Sortiliena: You two boys need to SHUT UP!

Lojky: So I might have read the books. Up to… I think volume 13. So if I seem ill-knowledgeable (which is a word now) try to cut me some slack. They haven't released all the novels in english yet. But yeah, Alicization and AGGO will be included.

Eugeo: AGGO?

Lojky: SHHHH NOT YET! INSERT OUTRO BEFORE MORE QUESTIONS ARE ASKED OF ME!

Kirito: What. Does. That. MEAN?!

Lojky: I TOLD YOU IT'S JUST MY THING!


	5. Re: Ask 4 - No Cussing Button!

**LegendaryPotatoGuy Writes:**

 _ **Time to ask a review...Bit-**_

Lojky: *Presses the NCB (No Cussing Button)* NO CUSSING!

 _ **Ouch...sorry, got on a Brutalmoose Binge**_

Lojky: Oh… The internet is a strange place. I just looked that up.

 _ **Anyway, this is rebooted. Did't expect that, just warning you, the crowd for Q &A on FanfictionDotNet can get pretty hectic (especially because the Who thing is a "legal grey zone"), trust me, I know.**_

Lojky: What "Who thing?" Like, Doctor Who? And I heard that they've been cracking down on Q&A's all over. But I think it'll be fine.

Kirito: *Subtly knocks on wood*

 _ **Anyway, I should ask at least one questions before I have dinner, so here I go!**_

 _ **AB!Kirito: Hello, Mr. Better than the Original, how are you?**_

AB!Kirito: Well for starters, I am better than the original. I mean, I'm not just harem bait, I actually have something known as COMMITMENT YOU MORON!

Kirito: H-hey! What's that supposed to mean?

AB!Kirito: There's a whole arc dedicated to your fairy incest! I mean, look at you! Your sister. Wanted. TO DO YOU!

Lojky: Okay… This is where you stop.

AB!Kirito: Who asked you, you son of a -

Lojky: *Throws NCB at AB!Kirito's face* NO SWEARING!

 _ **That's all I got...sorry...maybe, uh, next time...**_

Lojky: That's more than okay. These two will be fighting for the next three hours anyways...

 _ **Question Next! (If you can do your intro on my Q &A, I can do it on yours!)**_

Lojky: Hmph. Fine. But I'm going to Insert the Outro anyways!

AB!Kirito: You know, sometimes I have to agree with my bonehead counterpart, what the actual HECK, Mr. "No Cussing Button," does Insert Outro actually mean?

Lojky: Just. Go. With. It.


	6. Re: Ask 5 - Bureaucrats!

**deepdownderp Writes:**

 _ **Please tell me none of you trust Kikuoka…**_

 _ **Bureaucrats, they scare me…**_

Kirito: I don't know. He seemed pretty trustworthy to me. Not to mention, he's how I met Shino and all the GGO people.

Shino: I'm the only GGO person you talk to!

AB!Kirito: She has a point!

Kirito: You should learn to be quiet.

AB!Kirito: Fight me online, you jerk!

Kikuoka: Kazuto, Kazuto, Kazuto, what have you gotten yourself- Woah. There are two of you?

Kirito: Haha, it's a long story.

AB!Kirito: Who the heck is this guy?

Kirito: Also a long story…

AB!Kirito: I swear to God if this bureaucrat tries to take my go[sh] da[ng] money… Wait. What just happened to my swear words?

Lojky: Yes! I fixed it! The new NCB III! It replaces your swears with less sweary words! Hah! And this one doesn't have punishment. The blasts from the original and vocal cord pinching from the second proved to be too inhumane. So I made a better model!

Author: Y0U D1DN'+ D0 4NYTH1NG! 1 PR0GR4M3D 1T 1NT0 TH3 S-4SK-0 S3RV3R!

Lojky. Whatever. Insert the Outro already!


	7. Re: Ask 6 - Anti-Swear Software!

**Da Kaleidoscope Writes...**

 ** _Would you rather choose the right option, or the correct option?_**

AB!Asuna: I'm always right, so it doesn't really f[reak]ing matter, does it?

Author: 1 R3ALLY W4NT T0 SCR4P TH1S S0FTW4R3. R3PL4C1NG 3V3RY0N3'S SW34RS 1S H4RD...

 ** _Also, Lojky, glad to see you back man! Highschool okay? Lol what am I saying I should be asking did you die and is that why you're finding time to update? And if you didn't, I can offer a 5% discount for your entry to hell._**

Lojky: I'm glad to be back. HIgh school is hard, but it's fine. Oh. And yeah. I'm probably dead. Possibly. And maybe I found time to update because I really, really missed this community. Maybe. And I'll pass on that 5% discount.

AB!Asuna: B[rother]S I'VE GOT MY ONE WAY TICKET ALREADY PAID FOR! SIGN ME UP!

Author: L0JKY… PL34S3 INS3RT TH3 0UTR0 B3F0R3 SH3 SW34RS ANYM0R3… 1 C4N'T G0 0N L1K3 TH1S.

AB!Asuna: I'll Insert YOUR Outro to f[reak]ing [heck] if you don't watch yourself you-

Lojky: INSERT OUTRO! INSERT OUTRO!


	8. Re: Ask 7 - We Broke Yui!

**Theblazepanzer24 Asks…**

 _ **New one! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!**_

 _ **Anyways, I haz a few questions. Okay... a lot.**_

Lojky: Ooo! Yay! A long one!

 _ **1\. Kirito:**_

 _ **What would you think about a red headed, green eyed Yolko?**_

Kirito: I mean, if she wants to dye her hair and wear contacts that's cool with me.

Yolko: I don't know why you'd have me do that though.

 _ **Have you ever played Nascar 2002? I spend six hours playing that today.**_

Kirito: No… I'm afraid not. I do love racing games. Forza Horizon 5 was the best racing game of 2022! I bet I could beat you at any racing game, 'Bridgey.

AB!Kirito: Woah, woah, woah. Hold up. Did you just call me " _Bridgey_?"

Kirito: Heh. What're you going to do about it?

AB!Kirito: Give me a minute. I'll get back to you on that one.

 _ **If there was an Ace Combat VRMMO, what aircraft would you fly?**_

Kirito: Personally, I like the F-2A in the console games, but that may just be sentiment. I know there are better aircrafts out there-

AB!Kirito: Haha! I've got it!

Kirito: Let's hear it…

AB!Kirito: There are better aircrafts out there, and I'm going to… Nope… Uh… Give me another minute.

Kirito: But as I was-

AB!Kirito: And I'm going to beat you with them! Hah!

AB!Asuna: Honey, are you harassing your hotter, smarter self?

AB!Kirito: What do you mean hotter? He looks just like me.

Lojky: Shut up you attention hogs! Yui's got a question!

 _ **2\. Yui:**_

 _ **Is daddy still flirting with other people beside's Asuna? Perhaps with a certain blue haired sniper?**_

Yui: Nuh-uh. Daddy loves Mommy!

Asuna: Aww, Yui!

Shino: I'm not interested in that jerk anyways. Not my type.

 _ **You have any love interest?**_

Lojky: We… Uh… Well… Who would you even be interested in Yui?

Yui: I love Daddy!

Lojky: OH GOD NO-

Author: D3L3T1NG 4SS3T: Yui_Romance_Emtn

Yui: I feel empty inside. Like there's a longing for something I can never attain.

Author: D3L3T1NG 4SS3T: Yui_Goth_Emtn

Lojky: Well this is going to be a mess.

 _ **Any siblings...perhaps a certain illac haired forward teenage sister? * Cough cough * Strea * Cough Cough ***_

Yui: I do not recall any such sister. Searching database… Strea-MHCP002… This seems to exert feelings of familiarity throughout my being. Curious.

Lojky: AUTHOR FIX YUI SHE'S BROKEN!

Strea: Might I be able to be of assistance to my fellow AI?

Author: 0H N0 4N0TH3R M4CH1N3?!

Lojky: Please, PLEASE, don't touch her code. _PLEASE._

 _ **3\. Asuna**_

 _ **Would you want a sister? Perhaps someone to kick Kuredeel's tail for spying on you back in SAO?**_

Asuna: That's what I have Kirito for!

Lojky: I'm actually working on a story with that being a thing. It's a part of my Re:START Story set!

 _ **What are all the nicknames you have for the SAO player's you know?**_

Asuna: Well Kirito is my Handsome Swordsman, Yui is my Princess… And that's pretty much all of the nicknames I've given to the SAO survivors I know… I don't really have nicknames for Lisbeth and the girls yet.

AB!Asuna: I do! Bi[rdbrain], Bi[g mouth], Piece of S[uper awesome cake]

Author: PL34S3 ST0P SW34R1NG! C3NS0R1NG Y0U 1S H4RD, 4ND 1'M RUNN1NG 0UT 0F N1C3 TH0UGHTS T0 R3PL4C3 Y0UR N3G4T1V1TY!

 _ **Your thoughts on being called Lighting Flash Asuna?**_

Asuna: I wear that name with pride! But only in game. In the real world, I'd much prefer Asuna.

 _ **Also... is your hairstyle hard to maintain?**_

Asuna: On a scale of Kirito's hair to the hair of Nicholas the Renegade, I'd have to say it's a solid Yui!

AB!Kirito: And they say _my_ Asuna's weird!

 _ **Shino:**_

 _ **Hi...how are you?**_

Shino: I'm okay. Yourself?

 _ **Did you know I'm a big fan?**_

Shino: Oh, there's no need to say that… I mean, I only won one of the tournaments...

 _ **I...may or may not have taken a snap shot of the time when you took out that guy with the Minigun.**_

Shino: ACK! How did you see that? I was sure I wasn't being followed!

 _ **Liz and Kieko:**_

 _ **Did you two really like Kirito that much?**_

Lizbeth: I'm not going to answer that in front of his girlfriend!

Keiko: Why would you even ask that?!

 _ **Klien:**_

 _ **Take careful moment to think about this. * Glances at Kirito * Knowing what you know about her now, if she was the same age as you and was interested... would you date Suguha?**_

Kirito: Choose your next words very, _very_ carefully.

Klein: Suguha is a nice human. If she were older...

Kirito: * _Glares_ *

Klein: Nope! Not at all! Nuh-uh!

Kirito: Whew! I'm glad!

 _ **Suguha:**_

 _ **Also take a careful moment to think about this. If... Shino Asada was a guy...would you date him?**_

Suguha: Wh-what?

Shino: No seriously, what? What are you saying?

Lojky: NO! IT'S TOO EARLY FOR A GENDERSWAP AU!

M!Shino: So… you're saying I should go?

Lojky: We'll talk later.

 _ **Also... if you had to chose between Kirito being your sister or you being Kirito's brother, which would you chose. * You'd be biological siblings, of course***_

Suguha: Well, I do think female Kirito would be fun.

F!Kirito: Here I am!

Lojky: Author… Lock them up. No Genderswap yet. I've made up my mind.

Author: R0G3R! ST0R1NG 4SS3T: GenderSwap_Chrctrs

Lojky: Phew. That was close

 _ **Kuroyukihime:**_

Lojky: WRONG VIDEO GAME ANIME! But fine. Go ahead.

Kuroyukihime: [Headcanon Spoilers]

Lojky: [Headcanon Spoilers] indeed!

Kirito: Is it true? Are you really our [Headcanon Spoilers]?!

Kuroyukihime: Of course! I [Headcanon Spoilers]!

 _ **Say you had to date someone from the SAO universe...and no one from the show was related to you. You could take your pick. Who would you date?**_

Kuroyukihime: Well, definitely not Kirito. That would be wrong. He is my [Headcanon Spoilers] after all!

Kirito: I'm just so happy that [Headcanon Spoilers]!

 _ **My girlfriend looks almost exactly like you. But she's missing her left hand and her hair and eyes are a different shade of black and brown respectively. Just saying.**_

Kuroyukihime: Oh no! What happened to her?

 _ **Lojky:**_

 _ **Welcome back!**_

Lojky: Thanks!

 _ **Don't worry...I'm not gonna include my oc's. Well, maybe my girlfriend, but no others. Unless you okay it of course.**_

You, along with anyone else, can bring OC's. Just don't drop them off and leave them. And PM me if you have AU ideas before leaving a review.

 _ **Anyways, how's life been treating you? Anything exciting happen?**_

Lojky: Not bad! Life's been pretty good. And nothing exciting particularly happened. I'm mostly just trying to get through high school, and I missed this, so I decided to come back.

 _ **If you had to date a girl from SAO, who would it be? Mine would be Shino, Suguha, and Yolko in that order. Asuna would be forth. Unless you count Kuroyukihime which could be debatabley first or second.**_

Lojky: Huh… Probably… Um… I don't know. In the last universe I dated Keiko… But I think I'm going to sit on the sidelines here.

 _ **Also...the English dub of SAO II is out on Netflix. I'm kinda excited about it.**_

Lojky: I KNOW! I SAW! EEEEEEEK!

 _ **I think that's enough questions for now, I'm looking forward to your replies.**_

Lojky: Well I'm looking forward to posting them! Insert Outro!

AB!Kirito: ARGHAHRGH WHAT DOES IT MEAN?!


	9. Re: Ask 8 - Like Liking!

**GameLord The Hitman Writes**

 _ **Next questions!**_

 _ **Alice and Eugeo: Do you like each other? As in, LIKE like each other?**_

Alice: Wha- what?

Eugeo: Well… I mean…

Kirito: *Slaps Eugeo on the back* This guy. Of course they do! They'd never admit it?

Eugeo and Alice: WHAT?! That- that's not how it is...

 _ **Shino: Have you visited Kyouji lately? Is he doing okay?**_

Shino: No… I hear he's on parole now. I'm surprised his sentence was as little as was. I'll have to check on him at some point though.

 _ **Suguha: How's Shinichi(Recon) doing? Are you guys dating yet?**_

Suguha: That insufferable guy? Of course not!

Shinichi: Oh… well… If that's how it is…

Suguha: Oh! Shinichi! I didn't see you there!

Shinichi: Of course you didn't.

Suguha: I'm sorry. Shinichi! I didn't mean-

Shinichi: It's fine. I don't care anymore… I'm used to it at this point really.

Suguha: Shinichi-

Shinichi: Don't. Just don't. Lojky... Insert the Outro.

Lojky: Oh… Right. Uh.. Insert Outro!


End file.
